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Hi guys, I'm afraid I've been suffering a few attacks recently - the usual occult stuff. There has, however, been a development which I thought I'd share in the hope that someone would be able to offer any insight from a psycho-therapeutic angle. It's pretty hard to explain so I hope you're able to follow me. During the attacks a certain part of myself seems to manifest itself, offering protection and consolation, in the form of names and psychic impressions. To be more precise, I find that I am aware of certain names (in this instance Tracey and Alan) which become associated with feelings of security. These feelings, under the guise of these names, then seem to combat the attacks at a certain level. As a Christian I believe the Creator has formed these parts and reveals them in times of great psychic distress. Let me just make it clear that this is NOT like multiple personality disorder. I'm not taken over by a different persona, I'm fully aware of who I am and am able to think remarkably rationally and logically as myself. At times I've thought that this might be some sort of angelic intervention, but the more I think about it the more I feel they are parts of my mind - subconcsious, supra conscious, whatever, - where feelings of security and consolation are stored, expressing themselves, symbolically, at a conscious level. So then the name Alan is associated with a friend I once had whom I greatly respected and admired. (The name Tracey remains a bit of a mystery!) Of course this is all very esoteric and obscure and I hope I'm describing it adequately. I really wanted to know what a Jungian therapist would make of it all and if my interepretation is accurate. I've been thinking about going to a therapist but don't really know where to look. Could anyone recommend anything(perhaps transpersonal psychology)? Feel free to ask any questions which might make what I've been describing any clearer. | |||
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Beats me, Stephen. My first hunch was that these names might refer to your "guardian angels" but they might signify graced dimensions of the unconscious as well. Sorry to hear of your struggles, here. You've certainly been through a rough time with these attacks. | ||||
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You are not alone, Stephen. A fellow shared with me the other day that he was seeing these black balls of darkness hovering over his bedroom. His wife saw them too. He used an exorcism incantation which was given him by someone with experience in these matters and it worked! The balls merged into one and then grew very large and eventually slipped away behind the curtain, never to return.  If someone is deliberately messing with you, there is most likely some method of countering it. This fellow I spoke to felt it to be the case in his situation. Pleading the Blood of Christ was also very effective for my aquaintance. Those things cannot abide the Blood! sangredechristo.org <*))))>< | ||||
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Thanks for the replies. Phil, even reading the words "graced dimensions of the unconscious" gives me a boost. And yes MM, I really believe there must be some way of countering all this, and that it must lie in God's grace. There has to be power within and without to help fight the battle. I'm caught between the desire to find an answer and the need to accept the situation as meekly and peaceably as I can. One of the major problems is that, despite these apparent manifestations of grace, it also feels as if all channels of communications with the Lord are blocked. Its all about patience and trying to remain as calm as possible. BTW MM, I might be interested in this exorcism incantation and the fellow who passed it on to your friend. | ||||
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I knew someone would ask, but I didn't and I only know this man by his first name, so we may never know the specific incantation, but here are some ideas from the 1952 and 1999 Roman Catholic official exorcism manual. (It is not generally known that the RCC maintains a dozen full-time exorcists in the U.S.A.) http://www.trosch.org/chu/exorcism.htm caritas, mm <*)))))>< | ||||
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That's excellent counsel, w.c. Your last sentence is an important reminder to us all. | ||||
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I appreciate everyone's concern and encouragement. Right now it's impossible to pray with any strength of will or imagination. Simple phrases uttered with a kind of detached faith are the only way of relating to God. It feels as if the part of my consciousness which is normally so open and aware of God's presence is blocked, occupied even, by evil forces, and any attempt to tune into that part of my awareness only exacerbates the situation. So, yes, inviting Christ in as protector of my psyche is pretty essential, even if I'm unconscious of any direct response on the Lord's part. Two phrases spring to mind: "Thy will be done" and "Trust in the Lord". Having said that, there is an awareness of something, hence these mysterious names and the responses to attack they stir up in my being. Whatever relationship they have with the Divine, wherever they spring from in the psyche, I feel as if the intimate, contemplative prayer I have become accustomed to has roused these sources of comfort and consolation. Still, it's all quite baffling really. One thing, right now I miss the Lord's presence. I feel almost lost without it. It really is quite a fearful place to be, without God, or it would be if I didn't have the faith that His love is keeping me through all this. Naturally, the K both triggers and responds to all of this, giving me, at times, a sense of physical ease, but also a greater sensitivity to the crash bang outside my front door. Mentally, it stirs up both the mysterious comforting names and sharpens the tools of the evil presence to a point where my awareness (that third eye type of awareness, a kind of psychic imaging) is disturbed and contaminated. Anyway, thanks again. | ||||
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| <w.c.> |
Stephen: Have you ever found a spiritual director, or spoken to Phil privately about such a relationship? In your descriptions you sound awfully alone in all of this, which may of course be the nature of the battle with evil you are experiencing, and perhaps a period of aridity where Christ is present but beyond your faculties to detect. Spiritual companionship might ease some other areas. | ||
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Stephen, I think w.c. has a wonderful idea for you. Having a spiritual director right now for what you are going through would be a huge blessing. Phil understands both the spiritual and the K. Have you thought about the possibility of this being a "Dark Night of the Soul" experience? Sounds to me as if it could be. | ||||
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A spiritual director might be a good idea. I'll certainly give it some thought. Fortunately, I have a very understanding family and receive a lot of good advice and support from them. (My dad's the pastor of our church and is quite a wise and compassionate old bird.) However, perhaps talking to someone who isn't quite as involved emotionally might be a good idea, Cheers. | ||||
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| <w.c.> |
Stephen: I suspect you must be overwhelmed with this ordeal at times, but if you can take comfort in reading, let me suggest "The Revelations of Divine Love" by Julian of Norwich. Of course, go by your own lights, and spiritual direction, in any case, but I've found her graced visions of Christ real affirmations during times of crisis. The middle english is a stress for some readers, and there are accounts of the Crucifixion that are intense and gruesome. Otherwise her sense of Christ's love for our fragileness and longing is mostly tender and sweet. So here's a link to a title that perhaps distills her accounts in a more readable fashion: Click here | ||
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w.c. Thanks. I have a copy of Julian and you're right. It's a book I go to often for accounts of that tender love of Christ, and I actually get quite affected by her accounts of the crucifixion - I think they give a real sense of the intensity of Christ's passion. | ||||
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Thankfully, the severity of the attacks has abated somewhat. I am, however, left with a nasty residue, where mental pictures of simple random things, say a favourite book or an actor I admire, are contaminated. It's like a photograph or reel of film being overlaid with a faint, disturbing subliminal image, and applies, unfortunately, to Christian imagery aswell. I've had this kind of thing before. It's really just a matter of time. Images we hold affectionately in our minds renew themselves in love after a while, wiping out the unpleasant associations. w.c.'s word on purification is particularly apt. I think it's necessary to see God working to purify the soul through all this. It's hard going though and demands abstinence from any form of sensual, sexual indulgence, or else the wicked spirit is stirred up again. Thanks again for the replies. | ||||
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Is it chapter 4 or 5 of Ephesians in which the armour of the warrior is described? Maybe it's time to look it up again... I was reading Merton this morning and he was praising the English mystics for extolling Grace more than fearing Satan, as some of the Continentals have done. There was a nineteenth century evangelist who awoke to a vision of the Fiend at the foot of his bed. He yawned, "Oh it's just you.", and went back to sleep.  | ||||
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