Here's a summary of some recent studies evaluating the health benefits of forgiveness. That's a nice spin, huh? Forgive aunt Lola for her english bulldog tearing up your best sneakers, and that wheezing eases up a bit . . . .

Seriously . . . .

http://www.spiritualityhealth....ticle/item_6684.html

There's some good practical advice in those recommendations, but it's mostly on the psychological dimension of forgiveness. The way I understand the moral and spiritual part of forgiveness is that it is an act of will to wish no harm, but goodness, on the one who harmed us. This kind of inner movement seems to actually deepen the psychological healing, which I don't think can go very far without iit.

I think the point about forgiveness not requiring reconciliation is a good one. We can let things go and wish the other well and still decide that we need a firm boundary in the relationship--maybe a very high fence!

I think the point about forgiveness not requiring reconciliation is a good one.

Good points about proper boundaries, Phil, very consistent with:

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

I was taught that forgiveness involves acting justly towards the person who has hurt or wronged you. You don't have to agree that the person's behavior was ok, you don't even have to like the person. But trating the person in a just manner is the heart of forgiveness.

shanti