17 March 2004, 04:23 PM
elizabethSorry all. I have been busy with my other life...work. I guess I should tell you a little bit about it so then you will understand where I am coming from with this conference. I do gardening and garden design work. Most of my clients are either elderly or are physically unable to garden as they did...the love continues even when the body does not cooperate.Lately I have had some novices contact me for their first garden. What a joy that is. I thoroughly enjoy my work even though there are days when maybe I don't seem quite so enthused. So what does this have to do with conference #5&6? Well, first off, I must admit they do sound pretty Catholic. but once I got over that and thought about the things our church has done and the experiences I have had with my sisters in Spiritual Direction, I am really not that far removed from the sacraments as I thought.
I have experienced anointings,baptism (in streams),marriages(my own included), foot washings,memorial services, healing services, and communion. With each one I can honestly say the Christ was there and ministering.The Spirit is so alive and powerful. I agree with the statement"If we come to develop a personal relationship with him through Scripture and prayer, and if we are sensitive to his presence in Christian community, we will appreciate more his love and care for us made manifest in the Sacraments." Now how do I tie all this in with my work? I was told by my Spiritual director during one of our sessions that working with the earth is a gift. That no where else could I get closer to God/Christ. (I suspect that this will be cover in the next conference on nature.) But for me, I experience God/Christ daily through my work with the soil and the people I work for. From listening to their stories to planting seeds to pruning and turning the ground over. Scripture pours through my mind as I work. It is as if Christ where there beside me speaking to me, relating the scripture lessons He wants me to hear.I don't know if this qualifies as a sacrament for anyone else but for me it definately is.It also helps deepen my relationship with Christ when I participate in other sacraments.
That said I don't want to leave you with the impression that I experience Christ everytime I work. Sometimes I choose to be far from Him. I get too caught up in the world and it's demands as well as my own. But if I choose I can always return to the garden and his presence.
Upon rereading this I don't know that I answered the questions that were asked. so this is just a random reflection brought about by this series. Thank you. ~ elizabeth
20 March 2004, 11:07 PM
johnboyquote:
Originally posted by brjaan:
[qb] When Joanne and I came into the Catholic Church we experienced are first Church blessing on our marriage and received the sacrament of matrimony. We were married initially by a judge. I do not know even after receiving the sacrament of marriage if I understood what it meant fully but I do know and beleive that it was the sacrament that held are marriage together as my addiction worsened. God's grace shined on us even when I did not deserve it. The fact she stayed through the worse of my behavior is a testament of real love something I am only beginning to learn. [/qb]
Gosh, brjaan, that was a very depthful and generous sharing. It has been said that a sacarament is a celebration that uses symbols to effect (to bring into reality) precisely what it is that they bring to mind. You and Joanne are a witness to that for me, a sacrament to me showing how Christ loves His Bride, the Church.
And, I happen to believe that, sometimes, in the sacrament of marriage, we celebrate what has already been effected and brought into reality through cooperation with, as you describe it,
unmerited Grace by certain couples, wherever and by whomever they were married.
Thanks to both of you for your new testament!
pax,
jb
22 March 2004, 10:50 PM
johnboyFellow retreatants, below is a personal sharing plus reflection on the Eucharist:
Eucharist has really been memorial for me, not only when I recall Jesus' life but also the significant milestones in my own life that were marked with Eucharistic celebration: all of the baptisms, confirmations, reconciliation services, ordinations, weddings, healing masses and first communions. What fond memories and recollections of celebrating with those, like Jesus,
whom I call my own in this world. I think back on my earliest memories of going into the cavernous, dark churches, with only the little red tabernacle light to illuminate our entry, when my Grandmother, Mamon, would go to prepare the altar cloths, vestments and sacred vessels as a sacristan. It all seemed so mysterious and holy. I recall walking on the playground during recess with my best friend as we practiced our Latin as devoted altar boys and riding my bike to early, early mass, before sunrise, in order to serve. I recall getting in trouble in the first grade for breaking into a run, after mass, to the cafeteria. Then, there were the very first guitar masses of the 60's when Fr. McMahon was our pastor and he offered no scruples, such as even I nurture now, about whether or not we were
liturgically correct when playing our favorite 60's folk songs (I still have the songbook compiled by me and Joe Turner and Gene Wescovich).
Eucharist has been a true
meal for me, nurturing me with bread and wine, feeding body and soul and spirit when I could not find another way to sustain them. Especially when I commuted long miles and long days out of town, a getaway to daily mass reconnected me to home, somehow. In Covington, I'd sneak away from the office to St. Joseph Abbey, a place I'd reverence from childhood, having attended at Vocation Workshop at "St. Ben's" where I met Gary Ault, who would soon emerge as a Damean, my first real experience as a groupie. In Baton Rouge, noon mass at Our Lady of Mercy was my refuge from ... ... well, I won't go into that.
Eucharist has been
covenant for me, always there no matter what I'd do or how long I'd stay away. It both symbolized and realized a promise made by my God and my community to be there, no matter how prodigal a son I was.
Eucharist has been
thanksgiving in its richest meaning and truest sense --- as
all the love He's poured on me can hardly be believed and all that I can offer Him is thanks (to quote the Damean song). Once, when feeling especially thankful and counting my blessings, for which I have a complete litany, I imagined everyone I knew in the front of church standing and then sitting down as I mentioned each of my individual belssings, if in fact they could not claim that blessing; it seemed as if I was the last one standing, in my mind. We often speak of each of us having a unique cross, especially fit and suited to us. Well, that day, I realized that the converse of that is true, too. We are all uniquely gifted and blessed.
Eucharist has been
presence for me. In the
people gathered my faith has been strengthened when weak and their presence has consoled me when sad or alone. In the
Word proclaimed I have been edified with a wisdom that surpasses the knowledge I have been able to find in the worlds of philosophy and science and humanities, even, a wisdom that touches the core of my memory, understanding, will and heart and not just my brain. In the
presiding priests and homilies and liturgical ministers, Jesus is present to me again, in a unique way; and each of our priests has a special style and approach, all different and all really, really good. In the
bread and wine ... ... there is a presence that, if He could and would dwell within me, means that He dwells not just in the tabernacle but in all of my brothers and sisters.
Eucharist has been memorial, covenant, meal, thanksgiving and presence in the people, presiders, Word and bread and wine. It has been a sacrament, most holy, a sacrament divine ... did I mention Benediction? I could go on.
So, in all of this consideration of Eucharist (see below), I have purposefully explored the dimension of
what's in it for me? How does this square with the imperative: "Go forth in peace to love and serve the Lord." ?
Consider my favorite quote of Teresa of Avila (my rough paraphrase):
"Let us desire and occupy ourselves in prayer, not so much so as to receive consolations, but, rather, so as to gain the strength to serve." How do we reconcile this dynamic of
what's in it for me? versus
what's in it for God, for others? In other words, isn't the Christian journey supposed to be about
agape (what's in it for others?) and not, rather,
eros (what's in it for me?) ?
I read an article, several years ago, in
Review for Religious , and I forget both the author and title, but it was something like
Agape & Eros in Our Love for God . The author pointed out that, for Catholics, an emphasis on agape with an invalidation of eros would be heresy. He used the
Act of Contrition as an example and I think, also, the petitions of the
Our Father . He noted that in
imperfect contrition (which, mercifully, is all that is required) we are sorry for having offended God because of His just punishment (consequences to us) and in
perfect contrition we are sorry most of all because we have offended God, Who art all good and deserving of all our love (consequences to God). He further explores how, in Christianity, we are not dealing with a religion that has no rewards.
In fact, Christianity's rewards, both temporal and eternal, far exceed what
our eyes have seen, ears have heard or the heart of wo/man conceived .
I was reminded of this dynamism, reliving my adolescence, watching a Peter, Paul & Mary special on PBS last midnight, when Paul (Noel) Stookey sang The Wedding Song:
For if loving is the answer, then who's the giving for? There is no dichotomy between agape and eros. They are the obverse sides of the same coin of the realm of Jesus, which is love. Only love has currency in the Kingdom. Paradoxically, it is in giving that we receive .. and you know the rest of that story. What we learn is that the best things in life cannot be pursued; rather, they ensue. They result as by-products (not waste products) of living in accord with the Gospel values per St. Francis' prayer.
It has been said, for instance, if you want a person to laugh, you don't order them to laugh; rather, you tell them a joke. So it is with love. If you want a person to love, love them. I'm not saying that in parenting and formative spirituality we don't begin, as is developmentally appropriate, with the
obligational , but, somewhere along the way, if the obligational does not transform into the
aspirational , the point will have been missed and the journey impoverished. So it is with joy and happiness. It is in pursuing the values and ethics of the
beatitudes that their fruits thus ensue. It is almost as only if we choose to
be with this
attitude will we then glimpse the
be-at-ific . Blessed are you who do thus and such because, unbeknownst to you, whose right hand knows not what your left hand is doing, yours is the Kingdom of God.
Thus it is that the eros of Eucharist, what's in it for me, is consummated in the agape of Eucharist, what's in it for you, as I go forth to love and serve the Lord. That is The
Dismissal . Bring your Missal to church and your disMissal home, for they are two sides of the same coin, for having occupied ourselves in prayer we will have both gained consolations and gained the strength to serve. Teresa was a Doctor of the Church, so I am certain she would have nuanced her aphorism? Another
both-and-ism , brought to you by your Church.
pax, amor et bonum,
jb